Dale’s Australian Adventure – Episode 6

Well, the sharks didn’t get me on the Great Barrier Reef and the snakes and spiders left Unknownme alone in the rain forest so I guess the only thing that could be my downfall here is the beer. There are hundreds of different beers brewed in Australia and my goal is to try them all. Contrary to what we are led to believe back home, Fosters is not Australian for beer and seems to be viewed with the same attitude here as we view Pabst Blue Ribbon. I haven’t found it in any of the bars nor have I seen any ads or outdoor signs for it. I’m starting to think it’s not even brewed here and is probably made by Budweiser in St. Louis.

The food in Australia has been spectacular and I have had the opportunity to try a lot of new things, but if I feel the need for U.S. junk food, there’s a McDonalds on every corner, and a Krispy Kreme outlet in the airport. What I can’t seem to figure out is their version of pie.

I love pie. To me, pie is the best dessert there is, so I was quite excited when I noticed an abundance of shops called Pie Face. I popped into one hoping for a nice slice of cherry pie or perhaps my favorite, strawberry rhubarb. Imagine my surprise when I discovered that pies down here all seem to be of the pot variety and when I say that I don’t mean Colorado pot pies, I mean pot pies made of meat.

You can get beef pies, lamb pies, pork pies (which I always thought was a hat), and even kidney pies. Yum. Needless to say, I passed up the pie store and instead opted for gellato which is almost as ubiquitous here as it is in Italy even though nothing can top Italian gellato. I tried all the flavors except for Vegemite.

I also met some nice aborigines down here. The aborigines are Australia’s native people and have been living here for 50,000 years. They weren’t bothering anybody when the British landed in 1778 and started giving them small pox and venereal diseases. Unlike our indigenous people, the aborigines didn’t think to open casinos and get their money back from the invaders so they stayed in the middle of the country throwing boomerangs and playing didgeridoo.

The didgeridoo is a musical instrument consisting of a hollowed out tube of wood about five feet long. You blow into one end and a very disturbing sound comes out of the other end. It has the tonal quality of  a broken kazoo and is Australia’s answer to the bagpipes. I tried to play one but I think I can get the same sound out of several toilet paper tubes taped together or a piece of PVC pipe I can get at Home Depot.

From here I am headed back to Sydney to see anything I might have missed during the week I was working and then back home in time for Daylight Savings Time which should screw up by body clock beyond repair.

Stay tuned for more exciting adventures. Same Aussie time, same Aussie channel.

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