Monday, February 20, 2017 is a national holiday in America. It is Presidents’ Day, when 
we pay tribute to all of the men that have been president of these United States. There are 45 presidents in all but how much do you know about any of them? Probably not much more than Washington’s on the dollar bill and Lincoln’s on the fiver. If this is where you stand, I suggest you sit for a spell and learn some real facts about the presidents of the United States.
George Washington – (POTUS #1) – It is not true that Washington’s teeth were made of wood. What is true is that he contracted the first known case of dental termites.
Herbert Hoover (#31) did not invent the vacuum cleaner. The vacuum came much later and was named after Hoover because his administration sucked.
William Howard Taft (#27) – Taft served as the inspiration fo
r Elvis’s Hunka hunka burning love. He was quite a hunk standing under 6 feet and tipping the scales at 340 pounds. Before his presidency, the Oval Office was known as the Round Office but was redesigned to accommodate Taft’s prodigious booty.
William Henry Harrison (#9) – Harrison had the shortest presidency of them all. He caught pneumonia at his inaugural and died 31 days later. His presidential library is a shelf.
Jimmy Carter (#39) – Jimmy was the first president to be referred to by his nickname, Jimmy. Imagine the possibilities if that trend had started earlier, we might have had Tommy Jefferson and Woody Wilson.
Grover Cleveland (#22 & 24) – Grover was elected president twice but not in consecutive order. He was in, he was out, he was back in again. I want to know if he’s still collecting two pensions.
John Adams (#2) and John Quincy Adams (#6) – These two were the first father and son to be president. Later, George Bush (#41) and George W. Bush (#43) would follow their example. Even cooler is the fact that John Adams was cousins with Samuel Adams, the beer guy.
Millard Fillmore (#13) and Zachary Taylor (#12) – These two presidents have the best first names. We could add Barack to the list but nobody beats Millard, which makes me wonder why nobody names their kids Millard any more.
Theodore Roosevelt (#26) – This was a guy who loved to camp. He spent as much time as he could outdoors. When inside the White House, he made staffers wear deer an
lers so he could practice hunting with suction cup arrows
Gerald Ford (#38) – Ford became president when Nixon took an early retirement. But he was filling in for Nixon’s original VP, Spiro Agnew. Spiro also took an early retirement to avoid going to the Gray-Bar Hotel. Ford did nothing wrong. That is his legacy.
I hope that you will put the information you learned here today to good use on Presidents’ Day.
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